Hate And Then Get Over It

Thursday, January 28, 2016



How do we ever move on? I am so tired of cliche pep talks that tells me to find peace within myself, forgive and let go.

What do you think this is? A sinetron? This is what you should do. Tried and tested. Let's be real.

HATE.

1) Hate him for every single thing he put you through. From the pathetic excuses to the lies to every single shit he did. I mean it. It is okay to be angry. Being angry doesn't make you a satan. You're human.

2) Hate him for going on dates right after you. Hate him because you question yourself why he can move on so fast and you can't. Hate him because you know he's saying "I like you" to someone he just met for 2 days after the break up. Hate him for texting another girl "Good morning baby." Hate him for texting yet another girl "Hi". Hate him for all that because he's the jerk and you're not. At least believe that you're the angel because you have all the right to.

3) Hate him because you reject guys who try to take you out. Oh boy, you should be going out but here you are trying to focus on yourself. It is okay to put yourself first because like number 2, you're not the jerk, he is. You do not break another person's heart just because you suffer from a major heartache. You do not tell another person that you like him after 2 days of talking to him. 2 days! My God! 2 days? You're not a clown. :)

4) Done hating? CRY. You'll find yourself repeating this over and over and over again. You'll be emotional in the morning, happy during lunch, pissed in the evening, feeling thankful at dinner, back to crying at night. You'll go through a whirlpool of emotions. That is when you know that you cannot go on being weak. You have to find ways to move on. PMS only applies 7-14 days a month. You don't need extra pissy mood swings.

5) DELETE PICTURES. Throw away things from him or give it back. Your choice. Or keep some photos in a folder you most likely won't find until months later. Don't meet him when giving them back. Courier it or something. Or leave it to your siblings to be the postman. If you can't do it alone, call your friends up to do it for you. They will be happy to cut the pictures or draw devil horns on his head. You'll try all your might to not stop them. You'll eventually join in the fun. It feels good to stick a candle in front of the pictures and pretend he is dead. Remember to smile because this is a huge decision to delete and throw away every single thing.

6) Go back to number 4. Told you, it will repeat.

7) SCHEDULE YOUR PITY PARTY. Now this is hard to keep up. One week to cry, another week to talk about him, another week to practice not to talk about him. This is very important. You'll break your own schedule but it is okay. Try not to go over two weeks. You'll find it very hard to not tell your friends how your ex is this and that when your friends start to talk about certain things. Somehow, you'll want to relate it with the ex. Girl, do not open your mouth. Let it be in your thoughts but do not speak about him. Just don't! Practice this over and over again.

8) DELETE HIS FRIENDS. You will find yourself hesitant because you think by keeping them, they will tell your ex a thing or two about you. You don't need these unpaid feeders. If your ex wants to know something about you, he will figure it out on his own. You certainly do not want to be around people who are friends with jerks. YOU DO NOT KNOW HIS FRIENDS BEFORE YOU MET HIM. Bear this in mind. This will help you detox your Facebook feed because you can no longer see pictures of your ex when his friends post them. If you don't want to delete them from Facebook, you unfollow them. There's the 'unfollow' button so they won't appear on your newsfeed. Get out of their Facebook and whatsapp groups as well. You don't need to menyebok anymore. Of course, you can select some friends because...just because. Or perhaps you know these friends even before you met him.

9) TELL YOUR FRIENDS OR ANYBODY TO NOT TALK ABOUT HIM. You're supposed to move on. There will be people who will tell you that he tried to ask a certain girl out and the girl will end up sending you a screenshot of the entire conversation with him. This is obviously fun because you can see how pathetic and childish he is. You will find yourself gloating at his brainless decisions. You'll think you're the bigger person because seriously, he is going downhill. You will pity his next victims. Trust me, this is toxic. You do not need to know anything about him anymore. The more you know, the more you will want to get involve. Since you're having fun mocking his mistakes, you stop whoever that is talking about him by giving him or her his parents' numbers. There's no way you are going to babysit this ex of yours anymore. Or you can give IMH's number. Maybe he needs to be treated.

10) BLOCK HIM FROM YOUR SOCIAL NETWORK. It is the only way to stop you from stalking your ex even further. You do not need to know what he is up to. You won't get hurt. You will never know how boring or interesting his life is. Don't worry, you'll get the memo when it is time to attend any funeral. Not saying anybody's funeral.

11) CALL YOUR FRIENDS up for a coffee session, brunch, movie, whatever! As long as you're out. Talk to them about your feelings but remember all the rules above. Your friends do not need to hear the same story for months and years. Fill up your instagram feed with lovely selfies and pictures of you having fun. Fake the smile if you have to. You fake it until you mean it. Do old and new things to remind yourself that you're beautiful and fabulous. Be so powerful that you don't need to settle for anything less. Being successful at finding happiness (on your own) is the best revenge. Getting a guy's number is not considered as being successful. You'll deserve this later but not just 2 days or a week after the break up. Remember number 2 and 3. You're not a clown. Don't go telling someone sweet nothings for a rebound. Best part if you don't admit that it is a rebound. Don't be a child.

12) LET IT OUT. Post your emotions. INSPIRE OTHERS who are going through hell like you. Don't be afraid of social media. The quotes people share online are there to make you feel better. Don't worry about people telling you about airing your dirty laundry. You are not. You are just airing your emotions. Know the difference. Do not be afraid of anybody telling you to put anything down because they are not entitled to tell you what to do. They lost their privilege as soon as they walked out of your life. Of course, do not mention names. Do not give out too much details. Do not be afraid that your ex will fire back because he is boosting his ego. He needs to look good too, you know. Probably tell lies about you but the truth will prevail. Don't worry, your ex will need a dictionary to take in bombastic (or not) words in every posts. His level of intelligence can only take in pictures of naked girls and girls who only take pictures from the top. They don't need words. If your ex don't read books, you shouldn't be worried then. They'll probably need a translator for English words. :)

There! All the steps you need to be strong. Don't forget to pray as well. God will help you keep your sanity. Have fun! I mean it. Have fun.

Love,

Amalia on falia.and.amz



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